Wednesday, February 9, 2011

HONESTY: Does Anyone Tell The TRUTH Anymore?

The astute, BRILLIANT and fabulously marvelous Maya Angelou once said: 

"When someone shows you who they are, believe them."

This statement...this proclamation, this and of itself, speaks VOLUMES.

This is what stories are made of, lives are lived by {or wasted by}. This is the story of how God made the perfect man {and woman} and how far they/we have fallen because of  sin, self-destruction and selfishness. I mean this is more than a Biblical sense, its is all of MAN-kind, man AND woman.

Empires have risen AND fallen over this; love and hate, success and failure, right and wrong, the implications, the sources, the absolute essence of this quote and every word in it, is immensely PROFOUND.

It speaks a lot about truth...about honesty. About being true to ones' self.

It also speaks the truth about dishonesty, naivete, innocence and losing ones' self.

Let us break down the quote, shall we...lets see. I will try to write this so it applies to men and women as I ... interpret them in my own understanding of this.

 "When"...this applies to whether whoever or whomever you're dealing with ever decides to tell you the truth. It could be from the get-go...or after years...or never.

"Someone"...this could be anyone: mother, father, lover, spouse, partner, siblings, friends, boss, frenemy, etc., etc. For the sake of this post, we will use this for relationships {marriage and dating}.

"Shows"...*sighs*...the selection of this word is also very telling, very profound in its origin. 

Maya said "shows"...not tells nor says, SHOWS!!! Actions are LOUDER than words, but unfortunately for most if not all of us, we are willfully BLIND to it. Words...are POWERFUL. They can make or break anything that is properly {or improperly} placed. Words can build...words can DESTROY. But TRUTH, DOESN'T LIE. You must SEE IT, to BELIEVE IT; and/or...suffer the consequences.

If "they" only "tells you..or only says" to you; WITHOUT the actions, those words are lies. Dishonesty. Pure and simple. 

For example...person suspects spouse/partner is cheating, and walks in on {them} having sex with someone else. Person looks on, perplexed and cheater stops long enough to ask...what are you going to believe...what I tell you, or your lying eyes?

For some people, for a LOT of people, the answer, the unbelievable the LATTER. They DOUBT themselves over what is blatantly obvious, over what they already KNOW to be FACT...its called denial OR stupidity. Both, EITHER will cost you BIG. 

OR another dating tells his girlfriend {and I've been through this...if you're dating, both of you are SINGLE...but, I digress} dating tells his girlfriend "she's the special one" out of his many women "friends". THAT popular and sadly, WORKS almost every time. That man is SHOWING YOU - WHAT he IS...whether you believe the TRUTH {that he is LYING TO YOU} is up to you.
I can write forever on that, but if you don't understand those simple comparisons, you'll have to learn the hard way. Experience is a good teacher; it's what you DO with that lesson LEARNED that determines where that experience will take you...forward or  perpetually running-in-place. If you don't get it, then experience awaits you...and it WILL cost you in life, time, pain, sorrow and regret.

"You"...that's simple enough...YOU. Some weaken themselves by settling for what they know is not good, is not TRUE...if it looks too good to be true, it should be PROVEN true...not TOLD or SPOKEN as true. SEE IT for yourself..and SEE IT AS IT IS. Don't sell yourself'll end up ROBBED.

"Who They Are"...ok, this one can get complicated, but here goes. "Who" this person is...let's use an example...who is this person "saying" they are as opposed to who they ACT AS they are as opposed to who they REALLY break that down, this person can "say" ANYTHING...according to that "philosophy", they can also "BE", they can AND WILL SELL YOU...the bridge in Brooklyn. Make NO mistake, hundreds of MILLIONS of people buy this bridge all the time. Dishonest people, LIARS - SAY ONE THING and ALWAYS DOES ANOTHER. DON'T BELIEVE IT. Most will actually DENY this obvious "SHOWING" of who this person REALLY IS; a LIAR - a DISHONEST person. DON'T trust a DISHONEST person.

"Believe Them"...why would you NOT believe what someone is "telling" you? You can, it might be the truth, but if it isn't, it'll be at YOUR expense. 

So why not give them the benefit of the doubt? Because...they can "TELL" YOU ANYTHING. It is naive and an injustice to yourself to just freely give the benefit of the doubt SIMPLY because someone, anyone, "tells" you so. They should EARN IT. 

ONLY THEN will you KNOW and UNDERSTAND ... WHO THEY ARE....or you find out {through experience} WHAT they are.

The's a beautiful thing. It's raw, it's pure and HONEST. It can cut like a KNIFE. It can HURT. 

But the beautiful and most important part of truth is can set you free. Try it...SEE for yourself.


  1. Deep thoughts . . . I think we all, at some point or another, tried to convince ourselves of certain things while dealing with others. I've been sold that bridge in Brooklyn several times, too :) But as you say, it does set you free when you accept the truth. Free to leave, free to find someone better, free to be yourself, free to love again (not just someone else, but to love yourself.) The truth usually does hurt, but a little hurt usually spares a whole lot of misery down the line.

    I'll be rereading this post, just to make sure I didn't miss anything :)

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